At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Just cropdusted the office
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
