Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
never play flip cup with pint glasses
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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