i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
