I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
is this the sara with the beer cane?
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
