Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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