Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
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