i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
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