Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize