no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
he shaved USA in his pubs
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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