I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Randomize
