ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Do vagina's smell?
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
You left your underwear on the fireplace
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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