just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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