This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
is wine microwaveable?
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
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