This girl is more easily done than said...
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Randomize
