Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
