i need an iv and a liver transplant
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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