Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money