words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Randomize
