If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
