I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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