he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize