We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
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