I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Randomize
