how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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