Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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