Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Randomize
