I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
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