When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
