im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
