i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Your cock deserves a montage
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
