Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
