We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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