So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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