if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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