butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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