he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
