grandma shit on top of the toilet
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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