If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Randomize
