i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
It's blow job season.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Randomize