I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Randomize
