There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
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