Moan for me like Helen Keller
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
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