Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
