): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Randomize
