Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
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