She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
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he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
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You are the jesus of drinking
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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