We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize