Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
I could make wine with my vomit
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
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