fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
