well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stop calling my apartment porn island.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
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