i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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